tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1776456473941522431.post1062657341100080452..comments2024-03-05T19:50:31.497-08:00Comments on World O' Crap: BluesFaith TravelerScotthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02798340582589737829noreply@blogger.comBlogger29125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1776456473941522431.post-89157106984690314292010-12-28T19:43:48.270-08:002010-12-28T19:43:48.270-08:00And although the Swankster has given up on the fac...<i>And although the Swankster has given up on the face glasses in his person photo</i><br /><br />maybe the order restraining had expired on his lenses contactpreznithttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02112468490241139292noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1776456473941522431.post-44320197151987268962010-12-28T17:55:26.998-08:002010-12-28T17:55:26.998-08:00Still doesn't explain how they found that mang...<i>Still doesn't explain how they found that manger in Bethlehem.</i><br /><br />Maybe the manger had spotlights and one of those huge inflatable gorillas on the roof like a used car dealership.Scotthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02798340582589737829noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1776456473941522431.post-84507262366779088542010-12-28T17:41:50.666-08:002010-12-28T17:41:50.666-08:00Somebody's feeling better. Or you've gott...<i>Somebody's</i> feeling better. Or you've gotten into the good drugs.<br /><br /><i>In our faith journeys we come upon the outrageous counterfeits. How they wear their masks tightly.<br /><br />And their jeans down around their butts, gangsta-style.</i><br /><br />Damn, I wish I'd thought of that one.Scotthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02798340582589737829noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1776456473941522431.post-37953376600927286672010-12-28T17:39:58.535-08:002010-12-28T17:39:58.535-08:00I've often wondered how Persians following a s...I've often wondered how Persians following a star in the east wound up in Palestine instead of Afghanistan. One story has it that they actually saw a new star in the part of the sky associated with Judea and interpreted it as the birth of a great new king. Still doesn't explain how they found that manger in Bethlehem.<br /><br />parsecAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1776456473941522431.post-47094410676046542002010-12-28T17:37:28.890-08:002010-12-28T17:37:28.890-08:00But here's something I've always wondered:...<i>But here's something I've always wondered: is it considered impolite to serve brisket at a bris?</i><br /><br /> Just no calamari.Carlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03664920037425489644noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1776456473941522431.post-47511212125387392582010-12-28T17:36:17.172-08:002010-12-28T17:36:17.172-08:00there are numerous Herods who would stand in the w...<i>there are numerous Herods who would stand in the way, attempting to wreck the faith project.</i><br /> <br />Hill's younger, not sexier, sister...<br /> <br /><i>Such should never surprise the faith child. </i><br /> <br />The faith child is Nomad. The Faith Child sees all. The Faith Child will eradicate the human infestation.<br /> <br /><i>How interesting that every time heaven breaks through with some marvelous holy extravaganza of love and mercy, hell gets as angry as angry can be.</i><br /> <br />My suspicion is, hell sort of sits back and laughs, knowing that humans will find a way to fuck it up.<br /> <br /><i>He strung out his nerves to dry.</i><br /> <br />I saw this movie by Sergio Leone: <i>Entrails In The Dust</i><br /> <br /><i>In our faith journeys we come upon the outrageous counterfeits. How they wear their masks tightly.</i><br /> <br />And their jeans down around their butts, gangsta-style.<br /> <br /><i> It would be these very religious play actors who would some day plot the murder of the infant-grown-adult.</i><br /> <br />Did he just call the Jews "Christ-killers"? Dayum, even the Pope stopped that!<br /> <br /><i>Eventually the magi reached Bethlehem. </i><br /> <br />If only they had TomTom...<br /> <br /><i>The Jewish shepherds had preceded them in the cave stall.</i><br /> <br />The place still stinks of urine.<br /> <br /><i>If the magi had turned back somewhere along the westward trail, Jesus would still have been waiting in the Bethlehem cow stall.</i><br /> <br />And we'd have a slab of ribs at Easter instead of lamb.Carlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03664920037425489644noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1776456473941522431.post-32819030047508481972010-12-28T15:27:44.019-08:002010-12-28T15:27:44.019-08:00If Robe Snakes isn't already the title of a H...If <i>Robe Snakes</i> isn't already the title of a <i>Harry Potter</i> porn parody, it needs to be.<br /><br />But here's something I've always wondered: is it considered impolite to serve brisket at a bris? It just seems like the sort of word association that could put your guests off their feed.Scotthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02798340582589737829noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1776456473941522431.post-10059647892481832762010-12-28T15:18:28.436-08:002010-12-28T15:18:28.436-08:00aw, Scott, there you go making a mountain out of a...aw, Scott, there you go making a mountain out of a mohel. I was talking 'bout robe snakespreznithttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02112468490241139292noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1776456473941522431.post-51149806047961769552010-12-28T14:52:56.092-08:002010-12-28T14:52:56.092-08:00Oh, you people. Started out a shitty day here, but...Oh, you people. Started out a shitty day here, but at least I'm laughing. I know I have a reputation as an easy lol, but thanks.D. Sidhehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14810866162936064310noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1776456473941522431.post-10190635532039414652010-12-28T11:29:51.761-08:002010-12-28T11:29:51.761-08:00Remind me not to get the number of your mohel.Remind me not to get the number of your mohel.Scotthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02798340582589737829noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1776456473941522431.post-17465956673206643692010-12-28T11:26:37.506-08:002010-12-28T11:26:37.506-08:00Perhaps sacrificing snakes would have seemed vulga...<i>Perhaps sacrificing snakes would have seemed vulgar.</i><br /><br />but I thought that was the whole purpose of a brispreznithttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02112468490241139292noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1776456473941522431.post-8194194837330438922010-12-28T08:49:12.123-08:002010-12-28T08:49:12.123-08:00Thank you, M.Bouffant.
I was so focused on dog pe...<i>Thank you</i>, M.Bouffant.<br /><br />I was so focused on dog penii that I neglected to compliment you, Scott, on a Swanktastic post. Really, it is beautiful. He will be horrified to learn of his sacrilege (he neglected to capitalize an instance of "Child" and "Babe"). Also, why does he hate the word "manger"? It is a perfectly perfect word, and it doesn't mind being strung out to dry with other nouns.<br /><br />And I wonder if he knows that the Holy Child's Mom and Pop sacrificed doves at His bris. Doves! Perhaps sacrificing snakes would have seemed vulgar.<br /><br />But the key part of the Swankpocrypha can be found here: <i>"...We come upon heaven's own reward--sight!...."</i> He is trying to tell us his glad tidings: <b>Lasik surgery</b>! Our Pastor parson has the style fashion! He is...Swank.Larkspurnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1776456473941522431.post-70020746976955885852010-12-28T04:23:47.676-08:002010-12-28T04:23:47.676-08:00Oh, here you are. Thank God. My auto blog rejuvena...Oh, here you are. Thank God. My auto blog rejuvenator hadn't moved a lick for awhile. I thought you were out shopping. Or something.scriptohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17899049404620738944noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1776456473941522431.post-39967262447868249852010-12-27T23:59:36.493-08:002010-12-27T23:59:36.493-08:00I think I've heard about that before. Curly po...I think I've heard about that before. Curly poodle hair probably doesn't help any.<br /><br />And it was a perfect segue into what I came by to mention, that Pastor Fuzz up there's curly 'do is no doubt a Trump-style comb-over. <br /><br />Five'll get you ten (No idea what that means, but it sounds good.) you could just lift the whole mess up & check for lice.<br /><br />P.S.: Larkspur, don't be all apologetic when you have more than two or three sentences to share. Your always impeccable spelling & grammar alone would make it worthwhile, & the content's always good too.M. Bouffanthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04519088858760760560noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1776456473941522431.post-69499623613809375702010-12-27T19:30:41.658-08:002010-12-27T19:30:41.658-08:00The Festivus miracles continue to forth spring!
I ...The Festivus miracles continue to forth spring!<br />I like to icon.heydavehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15509102502417886790noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1776456473941522431.post-87527590738230333952010-12-27T19:28:38.350-08:002010-12-27T19:28:38.350-08:00Careful, too much effort may back fire.
While shav...Careful, too much effort may back fire.<br />While shaved dogs may be more aerodynamic, it seems to piss them off.heydavehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15509102502417886790noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1776456473941522431.post-27394369623404901282010-12-27T18:50:16.478-08:002010-12-27T18:50:16.478-08:00Thanks, Scott. The moral? Manscaping saves lives....Thanks, Scott. The moral? Manscaping saves lives.Larkspurnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1776456473941522431.post-28891905784945720942010-12-27T18:42:53.210-08:002010-12-27T18:42:53.210-08:00Not too long at all, Larkspur. I can't speak ...Not too long at all, Larkspur. I can't speak for the rest of the boys in the audience, but I know <i>I</i> wanted to hear how this particular story turned out.Scotthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02798340582589737829noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1776456473941522431.post-68238796426028427822010-12-27T18:13:10.882-08:002010-12-27T18:13:10.882-08:00When I was little, no one had the vaguest most rem...When I was little, no one had the vaguest most remotest far-out idea what the terms "browser" and "cookies" would come to mean. No fucking idea. Spaceships, yes, FTL travel, yes, mini-Cooper-type vehicles that you could fly, like the Jetsons, oh yes. But browsers were ruminants out in the field, or shoppers without money. Cookies were delicious. Tab was what you washed the cookies down with. It's a funny old world.<br /><br />OMG, wait: I have to tell somebody about my horrifying pet-sitting day with the happy ending! Me, two toy poodles, the last day of my current stay. I'd noticed that the boy toy poodle was ever so slightly lethargic yesterday afternoon and this morning, but everything else seemed normal - appetite, poop, pee - so I just said, "Hmmm", and I left, as scheduled. Their mom came home about two hours later, and in the interim, the boy toy poodle had come down with a monstrous case of priapism, most of which was <i>turning blue</i>.<br /><br />Holy baby jeebus. She took him to the vet. I spent part of the afternoon looking up information about canine penile disorders. She just called me to tell me that he's all better. What had happened (and I read about this possibility online) is that he hasn't been groomed lately, and his netherbits were extra-furry, and some of the dangling strands had wrapped around his little penie <i>like a noose</i>.<br /><br />Thank you, holy baby jeebus. It's not a disease, and it wasn't my fault, and it happened fast and I couldn't have known. I swear that from now on, I will wash and trim the hair around dog penii whether they like it or not. Because I am the boss of them. Also, my nerves can't take it that I might be the cause of anyone's owie.<br /><br />This is probably too long.Larkspurnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1776456473941522431.post-61847570392762183302010-12-27T11:20:56.594-08:002010-12-27T11:20:56.594-08:00I'm too paranoid. Tell Annti to tell her brows...I'm too paranoid. Tell Annti to tell her browser to accept cookies, and to accept cookies from 3rd parties, and to not ask her first but to just accept them and keep them until they expire. (Options or tools, should be in a privacy tab somewhere, depending on browser.)<br /><br />Hopefully she has the same problem I did, and that'll fix it.D. Sidhehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14810866162936064310noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1776456473941522431.post-12061920070851192622010-12-27T10:43:20.016-08:002010-12-27T10:43:20.016-08:00Thanks, heydave. Sheri and I would really appreci...Thanks, heydave. Sheri and I would really appreciate it if you guys could spread to the word to any other members of the Wo'C Diaspora you may know about our new clubhouse.<br /><br />And Anon: Actor has, happily, already found us. He posted in the Babes in Toyland thread, but using his super secret codename of "Carl."Scotthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02798340582589737829noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1776456473941522431.post-47665585558055815392010-12-27T10:17:06.571-08:002010-12-27T10:17:06.571-08:00I feel the need for a certain actor.I feel the need for a certain actor.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1776456473941522431.post-43355742636700788152010-12-27T09:21:28.790-08:002010-12-27T09:21:28.790-08:00Yay, D. made it! How'd your partner do it? A...Yay, D. made it! How'd your partner do it? Annti wrote me to say she's still having trouble commenting.Scotthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02798340582589737829noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1776456473941522431.post-629562577681614312010-12-27T08:13:25.423-08:002010-12-27T08:13:25.423-08:00All anthropomorphizing apart, it was on my to-do l...All anthropomorphizing apart, it was on my to-do list to contact you, Mr. Riley, among others to inform them, as needed, of the new WoC spot.<br /><br />Ahem, glad you found it anyway!heydavehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15509102502417886790noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1776456473941522431.post-74038894991674175632010-12-27T06:35:34.361-08:002010-12-27T06:35:34.361-08:00Face glasses. heydave wins the internets.
(I assu...Face glasses. heydave wins the internets.<br /><br /><i>(I assume this is the ecclesiastical version of that "Tastes Great! Less Filling!" debate.)</i><br /><br />I thought it was an offer to play Assign the Random Adjective to an Animal Species. Nosy as turtles! Lithe as shoats! Winsome as rhinoceroseses!Doghouse Rileyhttp://doghouseriley.blogspot.comnoreply@blogger.com