Have at it!
Friday, October 5, 2012
Have a Coke and a Tight, Forced, Uncomfortable Smile!
This has been sitting in my blog fodder folder for awhile, quietly weeping for a caption, and it's starting to skeeve me out. I'll get the ball rolling, shall I?
Young George Will and his wingman "Bombo" chat up the gals at the Halt! For A Malt! Shoppe by explaining how the ice in their Cokes isn't actually melting, because entropy is a leftist hoax.
Have at it!
Have at it!
There'd certainly be a Mormon joke in there if it weren't for the Coke-chugging.
ReplyDelete"How do you think the puppet feels?"
"I'm a bear! I like to hide in caves! Can I see yours?"
ReplyDeleteThat's cute, Georgie, but Fawn and I are going to the prom together.
ReplyDelete~
Looks like a Romney Gone Wild moment to me...
ReplyDelete"So I stuck my hand out the car window and a big-rig ripped it right off! No health insurance, so couldn't afford a prosthetic, but the doctor's nurse gave me this puppet! Say hi to "Bearly There"!"
ReplyDelete"And Papa Bear said to Goldilocks, 'It rubs the lotion on its body or it gets the hose again.' Hey, want to come over and see my Goldilocks puppet?"
ReplyDelete"This is what happens to your hand after you drink too much oversugared crap."
ReplyDeleteLater, when he exchanged the bear puppet for a fake cast, Ted Bundy succeeded in luring youg women to their doom.
ReplyDeleteYou guys above are sick!
ReplyDeleteI can't come up with anything. As usual, as an illustrator I am gobsmackarooned by the beautiful technique those old ad artists had to develop. Sure the image itself is corny and sometimes, as in this case, downright offensive to the modern eye (o tempora, o mores, o please put away that puppet). But whoever the artist was, he knew what to do with a pallete full of gouache paint and brush. Actually, this pic is worthy of a whole late 40s - early 50s teen playlet in the style of "Dead of Night".
Bombo: "Now if my friend Georgie here would just move his left hand, girls, you'd really see something. Like this, but better!"
George: "Ha-ha! Bombo said that, I didn't! Ha-ha, shut up, Bombo!!"
Girls: "Ooh, George, heehee, you're nasty! We never thought you could be so - "
George: "Hahaha, honest to God, it wasn't..!"
Bombo: "Hey, Janice and Viv! You want to lean over here a little closer? See, with these little felt mittens, I -- "
George: "@&1Xx%##*gack!*!!1"
Soda-jerk: "Wills, you got some homework to do somewhere? Column for the school paper, maybe?"
Yeah, I know.
You guys above are sick!
ReplyDeleteI can't come up with anything. As usual, as an illustrator I am gobsmackarooned by the beautiful technique those old ad artists had to develop. Sure the image itself is corny and sometimes, as in this case, downright offensive to the modern eye (o tempora, o mores, o please put away that puppet). But whoever the artist was, he knew what to do with a pallete full of gouache paint and brush. Actually, this pic is worthy of a whole late 40s - early 50s teen playlet in the style of "Dead of Night".
Bombo: "Now if my friend Georgie here would just move his left hand, girls, you'd really see something. Like this, but better!"
George: "Ha-ha! Bombo said that, I didn't! Ha-ha, shut up, Bombo!!"
Girls: "Ooh, George, heehee, you're nasty! We never thought you could be so - "
George: "Hahaha, honest to God, it wasn't..!"
Bombo: "Hey, Janice and Viv! You want to lean over here a little closer? See, with these little felt mittens, I -- "
George: "@&1Xx%##*gack!*!!1"
Soda-jerk: "Wills, you got some homework to do somewhere? Column for the school paper, maybe?"
Yeah, I know.
Oops, sorry about that. Something that ill should only ever be posted once.
ReplyDeletewhat really creeps me out is that looks like my Mom and her sister circa 1947. Fortunately the puppet guy looks nothing like my Dad or I'd be in therapy for another few years...
ReplyDelete"Joe found that using his puppet made his explanation of fisting much less threatening to the Collins sisters."
ReplyDeleteGeorge, one more sock puppet crack about us going out together and you get this Coke right in that stupid bow-tie of yours.
ReplyDeletePeople were much larger in those days, weren't they? Look how small the coke glasses look!
ReplyDelete"Young Jimmy Olsen had no idea the 'girls' he was innocently trying to impress were actually the deadly Harley Quinn and the Joker taking a brief vacation from Gotham in disguise..."
ReplyDeleteThose were probably 4-6 oz glasses, back before 7-11 made selling soda by the quart more popular than Pop Tarts.
ReplyDeleteGeorge used Bunco the Bear to cover up the massive calluses on his right hand.
ReplyDeleteOnly. On his right hand.
Dark Avenger: and yet they probably have as much actual coke in them as those alleged "big glubps" have. Those monster-soda cups are mostly ice.
ReplyDeleteOr it could be that people were, you know, bigger back then.
PS: Antti has found and been approved for a NICE apartment, a duplex, in a decent neighborhood. I'm jumping up-and-down with joy. She's also adopted 2 or 3 stray kittens found (or who found HER) in the "park" she was living in. Ya know,some animals can sense/smell One's fear, others know a kind heart when they see one.
"And then the bear says 'The Aristocrats!'"
ReplyDeleteThe Coke bottles from that time were very small, until there was competition from Pepsi:
ReplyDeleteA funny thing happened to Coke in the times leading up to the 1950's. A new cola named Pepsi was gaining popularity and taking customers away from Coke. The new drink was no where near as popular as Coca-Cola was, but Coke feared them nonetheless. One way Coke responded to the new drink was to create more than one bottle size.
This was a scary idea because Coca-Cola had always had just the 6.5 ounce bottle. In fact, a Coke executive said that, "Bringing out another bottle was like being unfaithful to your wife."
But Coke pushed on with the new bottles. In addition to the traditional bottle, Coca-Cola introduced a king-sized bottle and a family-sized bottle. The purpose was to help out women buying groceries. It would be a lot easier for them to carry one larger bottle among other groceries than carrying a cumbersome six pack.
Aw, K, that is such good news. I know I've been worried about Annti along with her friends here.And of course there would be kitties.
ReplyDeletePlease give her our best wishes for her new place.
Suezboo
Annti's got me on her e-mail list and I got her announcement about her new home on Friday. It's a great msg, pure Annti, including stuff about the kittehs -- I don't know if she's got full internets yet. Scott, do you think she'd be OK with me, or somebody else who got the same group e-mail, copy/pasting it here?
ReplyDeleteI'm soo happy for her!
DA,
ReplyDeleteCoke wasn't worried about Pepsi except for one thing: Pepsi deliberately underpriced Coke at all levels: fountain sodas, bottles, and machines. This forced Coke to try to cut Pepsi off at the knees by diversifying their distribution channel (sorry, this was the case I chose in marketing class).
This happened because...tada...Pepsi introduced the 12 oz bottle for the same nickel that Coke charged for 6.5 oz. Remember, this wa 1936, in the depths of the Great Depression.
Also, curiously, Pepsi marketed heavily in black markets.