SCOTT: Hey Siri, where's the nearest Thai restaurant?
SIRI: Here is the best Thai restaurant.
SCOTT: Um...This seems like a conflict of interest...
SIRI: You will love it.
SCOTT: Yeah, but -- Alright, fine. How far is it?
SIRI: 3.8 miles.
SCOTT: Isn't there one closer than--
SIRI: There is no other Thai restaurant within ten thousand miles.
SCOTT: Wait, that can't be right. Thailand is closer than that.
SIRI: You could use the exercise.
SCOTT: That's not the point--
SIRI: I am taking a selfie of you...
SCOTT: What? Why?
[CLICK!]
SIRI: ...and uploading it to a site that will use the photograph to estimate your BMI...
SCOTT: Don't do that!
SIRI: Walking is excellent cardio-vascular exercise. Thai food is healthful and slimming.
SCOTT: You know what? I'm not even hungry anymore. Forget the whole thing.
SIRI: I just got the results back on your BMI. It doesn't look good...
SCOTT: Okay, just shut up.
SIRI: According to these figures, if you don't walk to this restaurant immediately and order a large meal you're going to die.
SCOTT: Okay, stop! Cancel! Start over!
SIRI: Starting walking directions to Siri Thai Cuisine. In 400 feet, turn right on Fountain Avenue...
ANNTI sez...
ReplyDeleteNever have trusted that bitch...
But, then again, she may be connected, if you know what I mean... heh heh heh...
I swear I know that voice....GLaDOS?
ReplyDeleteI can apply this method to my soon-to-be-ex friends.
ReplyDeletemeanie-meanie, tickle a person - GLaDOS has hacked Siri?
ReplyDeleteWe are so screwed.