[Jack Palance voice] Think...again!
Like your kitchen, when you snap on the light, surprising all those cockroaches you didn't know were partying there in the middle of the night; every month of the year is lousy with holidays, ranging from "Historic Holidays of Significance" to "I Defy You to Explain to Me Why This is Even a Holiday" holidays, which are historically the hardest to shop for.
Allow me, MaryC, to go over select feasts, fetes, and fiestas, and let you know which are worthy of celebration, and which are just...really...not necessary. At all. (Be advised, some of these holidays have passed. But, since they're just made up, you can celebrate them anytime!)
January 8th: Male Watchers Day (I see what you did there, you phony holiday creator you!)
It's not as objectifying as it sounds, although an image search did have THIS as a first listing:
However, on further investigation, I found this helpful graphic:
Yes, you better get tested for any STDs, because who knows what kind of disease you got from...watching... hot guys? All that aside, nice of Emma Stone to volunteer as the Spokesperson for Ocular Gonorrhea .
January 9th: Play God Day Also known as "Supervillain Appreciation Day."
Apparently, nobody really knows what this holiday is for. It's either a day for creating life, or a day for Cos-Playing as a Doctor.
Preferably, the Tenth Doctor. Just because I think he's cute
January 17th: Ditch New Year's Resolutions Day
AKA, The Easiest Holiday of the Year.
Interesting factoids for this holiday:
Flower of the Day: Avocado - grow them indoors!
Recipe of the Day: Herb Wine Sauce
My guess? If you vowed to give up fats and alcohol for 2015, then the day you ditch that resolution should include a meal with avocados and an Herb Wine Sauce. Also, the most ardent celebrants of this holiday are people so lazy they cultivate their avocados indoors so they can harvest them without moving from the couch during The Price Is Right.
So what are your plans for the holiday? And how did you spend Male Watcher's Day this year? (I imagine that one is a pretty simple day of devotion to discharge, at least for you males, since all you'd need to do is put up a mirror beside your computer and just watch yourself out of the corner of your eye all day like a parakeet. )