This is for Suzeboo (And yes, it's for me, too)

Nathan Fillion in "Firefly". Best. TV Show. EVER!

Happy Birthday, Mary C!

Child Wrangler, Cat Whisperer, Top Chef, and lover of fine Beefcake, Mary C is celebrating her natal anniversary in high style today!  It started with an old fashioned birthday breakfast (scotch and cigarettes); later, her dad gave her five dollars, she had sex with a greasy mobster, then turned around and promptly two-timed him with the irresistibly fresh-faced winner of the high school essay contest, and got a free pair of shoes!

And tonight, we're gonna break that fiver and paint the town!

What the hell is that in your hair -- axel grease?  Bacon fat?  Is your scalp getting ready to swim the English Channel?

 So while she's still sober enough to appreciate it, please join me in wishing Mary a very happy birthday.

(Okay, okay!  And here's a shot of Nathan Fillion sporting a pair of Lt. Dangle shorts, in lieu of Ann Coulter)

[Photo courtesy of Poinçon Mon Sac™Sportswear]

Tappity - Tap - Tap

Just a quick update, in case anybody is still out there.  My deadline is Monday, and assuming I meet it, a state resembling normal blogging should resume by the middle of the week (unless Sheri or Mary are inspired to post something in the meantime).  (Also, I want to apologize for the photo, as I realize this breaks with our long-standing, deadline-related tradition of naked flappers posing with vintage typewriters, but while Eddie Haskell here was willing to work nude, the sock-garters kind of ruined it for me.)

Speaking of paradoxes, I caught Riley using Moondoggie's ass for a pillow, and managed to snap a picture before she wished me into the cornfield.  Please feel free to supply your own caption to either image.

And thanks again for your patience.

Holiday in Cambodia

I'd like to apologize for taking such an extended break from the blog -- and to thank Mary for stepping in to supply some much needed beefcake and camelid porn -- but as I mentioned the other day, I've gotten a short-lived but intense paying gig, and it's sucking up all my time and energy.  With any luck, I should be wrapping up the more labor-intensive phase of it in the next week or so, but in the meantime...how about a caption contest?

This is what I imagine you'd get if Pastor Swank finally just gave up on the written word and opted instead to express his ideas through the eloquent language of modern dance.

(via Retrogasm)

Post-Friday Beast Blogging: The Peeping Tomcats Edition

Riley:  I just don't get the appeal of voyeurism.  I mean, I look in the neighbor's apartment, and all I see is the same crappy IKEA furniture we have.  The same books piled on the coffee table.  The same cat toys scattered around the -- Hey, wait a second -- !

A Walk with Love and Death (But Mostly Death)

Smooth, stylish, and only occasionally crazy-looking actor Michael Gough has left this world for a better one -- in other words, a world which does not contain Joel Schumacher movies.

Gough, who in his movie roles supplied the Grim Reaper with a great deal of wholesale business, was himself a reluctant customer, succumbing at the age of 94.  His work stretched from Ealing's The Man in the White Suit and Olivier's Richard III to Burton's Corpse Bride and Alice in Wonderland, with stops along the way at Horrors of the Black Museum, Black Zoo, Dr. Terror's House of Horrors, Trog, Horror Hospital, The Legend of Hell House, and Top Secret!

And even though we featured Mr. Gough twice in Better Living Through Bad Movies (1961's Konga, and 1997's Batman & Robin), there were no hard feelings on our part, and we remained happy to see him whenever he popped up in a film.  So good night, Mr. Gough; and flights of mutated chimps sing thee to thy rest.

Because It's BillS's Birthday and Because there can NEVER be enough Nathan Fillion...

Here is Nathan Fillion taking his shirt off:

You're welcome. And Happy Birthday.