Great, the Russian guy next door is wandering around in his underpants again. And it's that venerable pair that was clearly manufactured to meet the highest standards of Brezhnev-era quality control.
. Think you've come to give me my pill
, do you?
Think again! You're not getting that vile thing anywhere near
my mouth. Now shoo
, biped! Begone with you!
Um. Little help here...?
It's just so hard for me to find a comfortable position!...Ahhh, there
we go. Perfect.
I love those kitties.
Pill pockets rule
Pill pockets have never worked with Biddy, Bubbe Boy, or James, I'm sad to say --- I have to crack his twice-daily pills up into tiny pieces (pill "slicers" or "splitters" only reduce his meds to DUST), then drop 'em down his gullet for as long as he'll let me hold his gigantic fangs apart. And yes, he can out-spit any hayseed @ a Charlie Daniels concert, but sooner or later, all of those tiny pieces WILL make it into his tummy. Bribery with good treats helps, though it's harder than hell to find feline Greenies around here, or even GoodLife Recipe treats, unless I have the $$ to order from 1800PetMeds.com.
I refuse to give him "junk food" treats that serve no actual nutritional PURPOSE, and nope, I will NEVER AGAIN afflict ANY kitteh with the poison known as "hairball treats," which WERE taken off of the market for a while, but have somehow slithered their way back onto the shelves. Just remember the Teamster-grade "beer gut" that those fuckers gave my sweet little Biddy by forcing her hairballs into her intestines, instead of letting them come up as they're naturally supposed to do. Yeah, they sold 'em as a "cure," as something "beneficial" for the cats, but, surprise-surprise: THEY *LIED*!!!
Give Riley all of our love with those damnable pills, 'cause James definitely feels her pain, and he loathes his pills as much as Herself. And know that I commiserate with you & Mary, Scott, for being the loving caregivers who are willing to risk life & limb to get those pills into Riley. I wish that they made a form of very-fine-gauge chainmail for kitteh-caregivers, 'cause we all deserve it!
P.S.: I am sooooo coming back as Moondoggie in my next life...
P.P.S.: You're damned right, in the title, btw. For those of us who've resisted the urge to piss into the collective gene pool (let's face it, *MY* DNA does NOT need to be replicated, and the 3 troll-spawn that teh Dick & his Fallen Uterus WANTED should've been STERILIZED @ SPAWN!!!!!!), our four-legged, winged, feathered, furry, hard-shelled, amphibious, water-based, however-yer-pets-are-defined ("housepets" in the BDSM-collar-and-leash sense are up for debate...) --- SHOULD be covered under Medicaid, Medicare, and Obamacare, especially since the veterinary industry is even MORE obscenely-overpriced than the endlessly-corrupt "humans-treated-like-livestock" medical INDUSTRY. Our family members matter as much as the unwanted, unloved, snot-nosed ankle-biters who were only spawned to increase some trailer-trash welfare queen's income & food stamp balances, and once they're no longer cute infants, they're no longer "cute" and no longer get ATTENTION. You know, the kids whose meth labs BLOW UP, rather than succeeding like Walter & Jesse and getting their own fake headstones in Albuquerque.
OUR kids never need rehab, bail money, 18 years' worth of free dental care, free-for-SOME school uniforms, free-for-SOME school supplies, WIC cereal & milk, or welfare checks. They SHOULD get welfare checks, since so many of us have ACTUALLY rescued (as opposed to just *buying* a couple dogs @ the shelter, like that ignorant Katy, TX piece of white-trash Kelly Clarkson, who claimed, back when Oprah still had a show, that "THOSE PEOPLE just LEFT their DOGS THERE! Just went off and LEFT THEM!" 'til Oprah hadda literally cover her slattern maw and throw to commercial before she slit that stupid cracker whore's throat.) our kittehs, puppehs, hamsters, llamas, chickens, etc. from ACTUAL DISASTERS. Not that the SPCA shelters haven't damned-near killed themselves to save animals from Katrina, Sandy, tornadoes, wildfires, earthquakes, etc., but THEY did the rescuing, not the bourgie bitches who CLAIM to have "rescued" those critters. And there aren't ANY grants, fellowships or other federal funding available for us cat-wrangling/dog-herding guerrilla-operation critter-savers, so SOMEbody should. And WAY more funding for the ASPCA and every SPCA in every state in the union.
If ANYBODY is doing something to improve the planet, it's US and the people who ADOPT CHILDREN IN THIS COUNTRY, and the foster parents who DON'T do it SOLELY for the foster-care INCOME. WE'RE the ones who should be getting free medical care for OUR chirrens and grants to help feed the ones that we can't bring into the house!
Okay, enough soap-box for tonight.
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