Breaking with our tradition of spending the Twelve Days of Christmas highlighting crappy (and oftentimes, crapping) toys, this year we decided to provide Equal Time to Hannukah; and thus we conclude our survey with perhaps this season's hottest gift:
The Mensch on a Bench!
Anyway, like the Pagan -- sorry, the Christian -- "Elf on a Shelf", the "Mensch on a Bench" also has a list of rules one must follow when deploying the doll. (I'm beginning to think this whole Elf and Mensch thing is kind of a rip off of Gremlins.)
Like the Elf, the Mensch regulations require that one constantly move the doll, otherwise it's sciatica kicks in and it will be weeks before it can kneel at prayers.
Another rule involves giving the doll a Shamash Candle (which is always lit) to hold. Frankly, I think the creators of this "cute" Hanukkah tradition just want to watch the whole world burn, so if you get one, maybe play it safe and seat it next to your Batman plushie.
[Fundraiser explanation here]