But it's not all about intensely blonde women catcalling intensely white men, because some of the Politichicks are actually PolitiDicks, such as Dr. J.P. Sloane, who takes a subject -- occasions and events appropriate for the National Cathedral -- which in lesser hands might prove rather bland, and spices it up for the holidays with a dry rub of parochial panic:
Dr. Sloane graduated from: Purdue University, The Institute of Charismatic Studies at Oral Roberts University, The Moody Bible Institute, and The Institute of Jewish-Christian Studies.Dr. Sloane is also the World's Leading Wayne Newton Impersonator...
He earned a B.A., Summa Cum Laude, from The Master’s College where he studied at their IBEX campus in Israel and earned an M.A. in Counseling.The Master's College is not, surprisingly, where all those negligee-wearing co-eds in Manos, The Hands of Fate matriculated, but a Bible school in suburban L.A. County (with a satellite campus in Israel staffed by a faculty of wild goats). Their mission statement calls for "Intellectual growth, as evidenced by," among other things, "Willingness to defend the inerrancy, authority and sufficiency of the Scriptures."
Anyway, the sheer number of schools he's attended is Palinesque, and we're not even done, because Dr. (or should I say "Dr."? I probably should) Sloane "earned two doctorates" from Trinity Theological Seminary, which is an unaccredited correspondence school in Indiana. And all this while cultivating a PTL-worthy pompadour and a pencil mustache!
So let's see what's caused "Dr." Sloane's consternation about the abomination desecration. I'm gonna guess it's religious desegregation, leading to Muslim indoctrination.
America was founded on the premise that we are the second Israel because—like Israel—we were founded to honor the God of the Bible and His Laws.
I guess I missed that Article in the Constitution, but I'll admit I started skimming about halfway through, and then just skipped to the end to see who did it. However, assuming, arguendo, that we were founded to be the "second Israel," this raises the question of whether we're a good sequel, like Captain America: The Winter Soldier, or a bad sequel, like Highlander II: The Quickening. Or perhaps Israel is just a really crappy prequel, like Episode One: The Phantom Menace.
In 1607 the very first act of the first English speaking settlers was to plant a huge Cross on Cape Henry at Virginia Beach dedicating America and the new continent to Christ.
Their second act was to promptly begin starving to death.
This act was followed by the Pilgrims arrival in 1620 who made a covenant (Mayflower Compact) with God between themselves and their new land. Our Constitution is based on that covenant.That explains why the Preamble to the Constitution spends so much ink kissing the king's ass. Anyway, I'm sure the Iroquois are relieved to be off the hook for an alleged compendium of civil rights that can't even manage to prohibit torture. At least not according to Justice Scalia.
The discoverer of this new land by Europeans was Christopher (means “Christ-bearer”) Columbus. One of the main purposes of his adventure was to spread the gospel of Jesus Christ to the heathens.
He did this primarily through slavery, disease, and murder, since televangelism hadn't been invented yet.
On 9/11 God sent a harbinger (sign of warning) to Israel in the form of attacks by Assyria when they began turning their backs on God and seeking other supernatural sources (Isaiah 8-9).
Sadly, ancient Israel missed this sign of warning through a clerical error; since the Gregorian calendar hadn't been invented yet, they actually got the September 11 harbinger on 16 Elul. Also, let's face it, Isaiah is a pretty action-packed book, and they could easily have been distracted by all the satyrs and dragons in chapter 13 (h/t to Yastreblyansky)
In England the Muslims are buying up all the abandoned Christian churches and making them their mosques. By doing so, Muslims hope to establish in the minds of others the superiority of Islam.
Their actions makes a mockery of the Christian faith, whose strength is symbolized by its many abandoned churches!
In non-Muslim countries where they build mosques, the minarets are taller than the church steeples.
But "minaret" doesn't rhyme with "people," so muslims can't do that finger-wiggling thing to amuse bored kids on the way to Easter mass.
In the National Cathedral in Washington, D.C., which took 83 years to build, the unthinkable has occurred in only 24 years after the cathedral’s completion. On November 14, 2014—two months after the anniversary of 9/11—on the Muslim Sabbath—the first of many planned Islamic worship services began on the eve of our nation’s day of Thanksgiving to the biblical God and the ushering in of the Christmas season.
If you look to this paragraph to provide what most do -- thoughts, meaning, and impressions conveyed through the medium of the English language -- you're likely to be disappointed. But if you add up all those superfluous figures and dates you'll have enough numbers to play Lotto Pick Six.
America has murdered millions of its own sons and daughters in the womb—America has prevented prayers in school (except for Muslim prayers that are required by Shari Law)—America has sanctified homosexual marriage between men with men and women with women—and America has removed Crosses from our public view and nativity displays at Christmas from the public square in complete defiance of the First Amendment which clearly states: Congress shall make no law…prohibiting the free exercise of religion; or abridging the freedom of speech….Ah, so "Dr." Sloane believes it's against the First Amendment to not have a creche on the courthouse steps. KWillow was right.
The history of our National Cathedral began when the corner stone was laid under the supervision of President Teddy Roosevelt in 1907 and completed under President George W. Bush in 1990.
Okay, it may have taken 83 years to build, which seems dilatory, but I think some credit should go to George W. Bush for bringing his Presidency in ten years ahead of schedule.
Now the powers that be in Washington—in compliance with the presiding Bishop of the Episcopal Church—committed the final ABOMINATION to the God of the Bible by having a Muslim offer up Islamic prayers—in that Christian Sanctuary—to the Moon God Allah, resulting in an unforgivable DESECRATION of that Christian altar. This action brings further shame to America in the face of God’s harbinger that warns of America of its impending doom if Americans don’t repent!Anyway, Bingo at 7:30 PM on Wednesday. Bring a dish to pass.