Monday, February 13, 2017

S.Z.'s Guide to Valentine's Day

[Cross-posted from Sheri's Facebook]

Here's a thought: Valentine's Day isn't the boss of you. You don't have to celebrate it if you don't want to - but if you want to have a fun holiday tomorrow, you can celebrate it however you want to.
You can:

1. Have Valentine's Day for your pet. Do something fun and/or nice. Share your string cheese with the dog. Put construction paper hearts on the cat while she is asleep and take her picture. Make them both watch crappy movies about people who turn into cats or dogs, so they will know how good they have it, and will be nicer to you.

2. Send anonymous Valentines to your friends, neighbors, or coworkers. See if you can make somebody's day, or break up somebody's marriage.

3. Be your own Valentine. Treat yourself to a steak dinner, or some chocolate mousse, or one of those TacoBell things where the taco shell is fried chicken. Binge watch "Simpson's" Halloween episodes. Re-read a favorite book from childhood. Whatever makes you feel special and appreciated.

4. Have that expensive, super-romantic dinner with your spouse or boyfriend girlfriend if you want. But only if you want to, not because it's expected. If you don't want to, you can help me make cat cookies.

(Disclaimer: there is very little chance I will do this, because real cats would try eating the batter and stepping on the frosting, but they are sure cute. The cookies, I mean - the cats are jerks. But cute.)

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

ANNTI sez...

All good stuff... Would you believe that I actually FORGOT about this shit on the actual day?

I know, even for me, surprising. Dumber ever damned day, but what the hell, maybe there's still some non-NECCO candy on clearance!


And S.Z.? SO fucking good to see you on here, it's the biggest joy, oh, hell, of my past DECADE! Thank you thank you thank you!!!