Katie Pavlich is another new face -- to me at least, although she's been micro-blogging at Townhall's The Tipsheet ("Breaking News & Analysis From The Townhall Crew") since at least last February, and has appeared on that Greg Gutfield show on Fox...Deadeye? Browneye?...whatever it's called. According to her byline, Katie is News Editor, Townhall, so while she may not be a Big Cheese in the world of online punditry, nor -- judging by her fresh and dewy headshot -- a fine old Mold-Ripened Cheese in the Cal Thomas or Bay Buchanan class -- she is nonetheless a coagulated milk-based product to be reckoned with. So let's get recking.
...then socialists are tall, handsome dudes with nice pecs. No wonder they get all the ladies.
...walks like a socialist
...a skill he learned from Bill Clinton who, during his time at Oxford, interned at the Ministry of Socialist Walks. Young Clinton was particularly celebrated amongst his fellow Rhodes Scholars for his ability to execute the classic Emmeline Pankhurst with a double reverse Hubert Bland, and finishing off with a half-Laski -- a highly challenging stride that can occasionally result in a rupture.
...and talks like a socialist
...specifically, George Bernard Shaw, who was also incapable of delivering an epigram without the aid of a teleprompter. This was a source of some vexation to Shaw, because prior to the development of video technology, speeches were written on player piano rolls, requiring the orator to translate the pattern of punch-holes on the fly. (Toward the end of his life, however, after addressing the public on countless occasions, Shaw had become so adept at transforming the rapidly scrolling series of perforations into words and sentences that he once boasted, "I don't even see the code anymore," a line which inspired the Wachowskis to write The Matrix.)
...he's probably a socialist.
Oh. I thought this was going to be one of those "You Might Be a Redneck" jokes. And I was right. Zing! Take that, Katie!
Between his big spending policies to "stimulate the economy," the government take over of healthcare through ObamaCare, his "spread the wealth around comments,"
His "not quite knowing how to use quotation marks"...
his constant class warfare rhetoric and his desire to be more like Europe
TEACHER: So, Barry, would you like to be President of the United States some day?
YOUNG OBAMA: Actually Ma'm, when I grow up, I want to be a continent.
TEACHER: North America?
YOUNG OBAMA: No, America has too much gun violence and venereal disease. I was hoping for something with a rational health care system, high speed rail, and more casual toplessness on TV.
it's fair to say Barack Obama is in fact a socialist.
Just as fair as it is to say that you are in fact a "News Editor."
But, despite all the evidence, GOP presidential candidate Mitt Romney is unwilling for the second time this year, to classify Obamaas such.
I'm sure he would have, Katie, but there's just no room in the budget for classification purposes after the GOP pushed through the Bush taxonomy cuts.
You know, I believe the children are our future. Teach them well and let them lead the way. Then just fucking kill yourself now, and avoid the rush.
World O' Crap's Special New York Correspondent brings us a Miltonian piece on Mayor Mike's fall from The Man on a White Horse (granted, it was really more of a Shetland pony that had been spray flocked a cottony white using left over Christmas technology, and it made the horse kinda puffy and wooly, so Bloomie really looked more like The Man on a White Sheep -- nevertheless, he took a spill).
City Hall, November 2009, Office of Mike Bloomberg.
Chief of Staff: “Your Honor, I believe you’ll want to check your Daily Agenda.”
MB: “It’ll have to wait. I’m shorting a position here. Margin call, you know.”
COS: “Well, you have to announce a replacement for the School Board Chancellor. Mr. Klein is leaving at the end of the month.”
MB: “Where’s he going?”
COS: “To the Carlyle Group. Or Fox News, I forgot which, sir.”
MB: “Where’s Carly Fiorina? I thought we were doing a phone conference or something.”
COS: “Ms. Fiorina is unavailable. Something to do with negotiations with the Blackberry people.”
MB: “Well, who’s that other broad ... you know, the one at Hearst? The VP. Something black.”
COS: “That would be Ms. Cathie Black, sir. I’ll arrange an interview right away.”
MB: “Excellent. Whew! Who would think investing in pork bellies could be so volatile. And now I’ll have a cup of tea, and one of those nice cucumber sandwiches you promised me.”
COS: “Mr. Bloomberg, there were no cucumbers in the market his morning, sir. I went down twice.”
MB: “ No cucumbers!”
COS: “No sir, Not even for ready money.”
So ends one adventure with commodities, and begins another in the commoditization of public education in the nation’s largest school system.
Readers, may I introduce you to Ms. Cathie Black? She has no degree in education, or higher education, or anything that might involve education. So in this “special” situation, Ms. Black must require a “waiver” from the State of New York to overcome her deficient qualifications. The waiver comes with a rider --- she must be monitored by someone with at least a Masters Degree in Education. Or at least a high school cafeteria worker. Something.
Here’s Cathie:
Well, we know she has a fetish for “dog collars” or whatever costume jewelry strikes her fancy. Cathie didn’t last long after the “Sophie’s Choice” line, but the money-shot: “Can we have some birth-control here?” She lasted two weeks, perhaps three.
As you probably heard, the Kansas Tea Party group, Patriot Freedom Alliance, posted a photo of a skunk on its website, with the caption: "The skunk has replaced the eagle as the new symbol for the President. It is half black, half white, and almost everything it does, stinks." Naturally, this did not escape the attention of the cats.
Riley, of course, is also black and white, and has likewise suffered for it, frequently enduring the unwanted attentions of an amorous French skunk who sees only her saddle shoe color scheme. But she chooses, as always, to remain dignified, and replies to the Hutchinson, Kansas Tea Partiers by flashing her Malcolm X gang sign, just to mess with 'em.
Moondoggie is also two-toned, although as a Marmalade he is seldom subjected to racial abuse, and only occasionally faces the threat that a thoroughly pissed English football hooligan will attempt to spread him on toast. As a result, he remains young and innocent, and his response is to crawl into my lap, gaze into my eyes, and ask, "Why are people so mean?" Then, when I find myself at a loss to answer this guileless and profound query, he immediately follows it up with, "Why aren't you scratching my butt?"
We generally don't note the passing of show folk around here, except in certain, special circumstances -- say, the deceased happened to be someone we'd savaged repeatedly in Better Living Through Bad Movies -- because that's really more the province of Ivan from Thrilling Days of Yesteryear, or the Fabulous Stacia of She Blogged By Night. But I was genuinely sorry to hear about the passing of ex-moppet Susan Gordon, at age 62.
Susan, the daughter of independent filmmaker Bert I. Gordon ("Mr. B.I.G."), was an accidental actress; she filled in for an ailing moppet on Gordon's sci-fi cheapie Attack of the Puppet People (1958), and evidently made a splash. She'd later appear in three more of her father's films, including her last, Picture Mommy Dead (1966), with Don Ameche and Zsa Zsa Gabor.
But Susan had a very active career beyond the nepotistic embrace of the Notorious B.I.G. She was terrific as Danny Kaye's daughter in The Five Pennies, and memorable in the rare heart-warming Twilight Zone episode, "The Fugitive," in which she played a handicapped girl who befriends J. Pat O'Malley's runaway alien.
In 1959 she played the Natalie Wood role, opposite Ed Wynn, in an NBC remake of Miracle on 34th Street, broadcast live and in color, and went on to guest star in many familiar series of 1960s, including Playhouse 90, Alfred Hitchcock Presents, Route 66, Gunsmoke, and 77 Sunset Strip.
After she outgrew the moppet stage, Susan went to college, lived in Japan for 13 years, got married, became a mother and grandmother, and earned a Masters in Computer Graphics.
But to us, she will always be Sandy, The Girl Who Knew Too Much, in Bert I. Gordon's Tormented (1960) It's one of our favorite Mystery Science Theater 3000 episodes -- a Halloween perennial around here -- and in tribute, I've put together a brief compilation of her scenes.
It's not her best performance -- like all of Bert I. Gordon's efforts, it was done quickly and cheaply, and this film perhaps more so than most, since Mr. B.I.G. had sunk a lot of his own money into it -- but in every sequence she does us the enormous courtesy of blowing Richard Carlson off the screen. And for that, I will always be grateful.
If you've been wondering what passive-aggressive drunk-dialer and pillow talk influence-peddler Ginni Thomas has been doing lately, look no further than today's edition of TheDC Morning, where Jim Treacher obligingly flacks for the obliging flack.
Since she last irritated the public eye by phoning Anita Hill at the crack of dawn and singing "You Ain't Woman Enough to Take My Man" into her answering machine, Mrs. Thomas has not been idle. It seems that merely being the wife of a Supreme Court justice and a lobbyist for parties with a financial stake in Supreme Court decisions wasn't sufficiently potent to satisfy her conflict of interest jones, so now Ginni's a journalist as well. The self-described "self-appointed ambassador to the (GOP) freshmen class and an ambassador to the tea party movement,” is now working the Tiger Beat at the Daily Caller, scoring a series of puff piece interviews with the new meat.
But let's let Jim tell it in his own, apparently easily imitated, style:
More bad news for Holder -- Yet another Republican is being mean to him by holding him accountable for his actions. Matthew Boyle reports:
Freshman Republican Rep. Steve Southerland of Florida told The Daily Caller that Attorney General Eric Holder's "blatant disregard" for the congressional investigation into Operation Fast and Furious and the subpoenas he's been issued is an affront to the American people. In an interview with TheDC's Ginni Thomas, Southerland said Holder's apparent failure to comply with lawfully issued subpoenas is an exhibition of his "sense of entitlement"--
Translation: "Uppity."
--by acting like his position is his "stake in life" and that he doesn't "owe anyone for that position..."
Translation: Holder is an Affirmative Action hire. Not really sure what the 'stake in life' thing means. Perhaps it's a local idiom that doesn't translate well to English.
Southerland added that he thinks Holder is acting like he's personally guaranteed the position of Attorney General of the United States...
You know how hard it is to fire an affirmative action baby; at the first whiff of a pink slip they get the NAACP involved.
...and isn't showing any regard for answering questions the American people have about Operation Fast and Furious. "When we're elected, we must thank those that put us here," Southerland said.
We must also bitch about how a Congressman's salary really isn't all that great:
According to the U.S. Census Bureau the median household income in 2009 was $49,177, almost $98,000 less than what a member of the House of Representatives makes. But that's apparently not enough for Rep. Steve Southerland (R-Fla.).
During a town hall meeting in Florida on Wednesday, when asked about his pay, the congressman told his constituents that his yearly salary of $174,000 was "not so much" -- especially once you account for the number of hours he works, the fact he had to sever ties with his family's funeral home business upon assuming office, and the heightened danger he faces as a public official.
"By the way, did I mention? They're shooting at us. There is law-enforcement security in this room right now, and why is that?" Southerland told his constituents, according to the Tallahassee Democrat. "If you think this job pays too much, with those kinds of risks and cutting me off from my family business, I'll just tell you: This job don't mean that much to me. I had a good life in Panama City."
Yep, not only are we failing to adequately compensate Steve for the 2½ days a week he he actually shows up for work, but we're too stingy to offer him combat pay, even though this heroic man, like our brave troops, has seen more than his share of death -- primarily due to his inheriting a string of funeral parlors.
Anyway, sorry for interrupting. You were saying, Steve?
"And, when an elected official appoints someone else, they do owe the American people the appreciation of having that position. So, I find the blatant disregard of answering subpoenas and the stall tactics -- it is really a slap at the American people."
That's the problem with Affirmative Action babies -- they're ingrates. But then, you can't be expected to value something unless you've earned it.
Southerland was clearly made livid by Holder's testimony -- enough to start blowing his dog-whistle as furiously as the Police Sergeant in The Pirates of Penzance -- but racist code words aside, one must defer to his expert judgment. As a member of the House Judiciary Committee, Rep. Southerland has been witness to...Oh, he's not? He wasn't there, grilling Holder like Perry Mason? Then why the hell are we listening...Well, yeah, I suppose the opinion of the lowest ranking member of the Subcommittee on Nutrition and Horticulture does provide an unusually fresh perspective.
Back to Jim:
Remember: Eric Holder wants the Daily Caller to stop asking Congressmen for their opinions on Fast and Furious and then publishing their answers.
Actually, the Daily Caller's disgraced "reporter" phoned the nuttier members of Congress out of the blue and demanded to know if they thought Eric Holder should resign. A few -- among them some of Congress' dimmest lights -- said yes, reasoning they had a 50/50 chance of getting it right.
AKA the practice of journalism.
Yep. Fourth Estate. Fifth Beatle. 8th Dimension. What's the diff?
He does not like it one bit.
Wait'll you try serving him Green Eggs 'n' Ham.
Just try to imagine if an Attorney General had behaved like this during, oh, let's say 2001-2009.
Then try to imagine that, while "[e]xplaining his role in the botched firing of federal prosecutors, Gonzales uttered the phrase 'I don't recall' and its variants ('I have no recollection,' 'I have no memory') 64 times," including the immortal formulation, "I don't recall remembering."
The prevailing media reaction would've been a bit different, don't you think?
Yes, I think you'd have been defending him. And defaming any Congressman or -woman who asked him a direct question.
Southerland stands out as a real leader with clear vision and strong faith that is tested regularly in the nation’s capital. [...] The Daily Caller’s Ginni Thomas sat down last week with him to hear what makes him tick.
In this interview, this Freshman says and sees what many others don’t:
He should stop huffing the leftover embalming fluid.
While America is clearly broke, the Obama Administration is “redistributing our wealth” to other nations, according to Southerland, through the Federal Reserve and the IMF.
It's too bad Rep. Southerland is already married. I'd love to set him up on a play date with Dr. Laurie Roth.
Southerland derides the wealth and “money flowing like honey” around Washington, D.C.’s power centers, evidenced by nine construction cranes visible from the U.S. Capitol.
While there are some people who might be cheered by signs of increased economic activity -- especially during a prolonged recession -- Steve sees what many others don't, and to him, Prosperity looks like a dead body.
He would be hard pressed, he said, to find nine in the entire state of Florida.
But not all economic news is bleak in the Sunshine State! Thanks to rising rates of malnutrition and suicide, Happy Days Are Here Again in the mortuary industry.
You may have heard about the shooting in Hollywood on December 9. Or maybe you didn't -- it's not exactly an uncommon occurrence in the U.S. In brief:
26-year-old Tyler Brehm...angrily stalked the Hollywood streets in front of dozens of witnesses, screaming that he wanted to die and firing seemingly at random at passing drivers, unloading close to 20 rounds from what appeared to be a .40 caliber handgun.
An off-duty officer working at a movie set and a detective confronted and shot him, police said.
A truck and another car were struck by bullets, leaving two men with minor injuries — one man with a graze wound and another with cuts from broken glass.
I mention it only because it happened quite close to where we live, and our friend Chris Vosburg was nearly caught up in the mayhem. As he wrote at the time he took this photo, he was "out running a few errands and wondering what all the copters were about (found out later). Jeez, glad I was too lazy to swing by my bank" [located at the same intersection where the shooting occurred]. "As Marge Gunderson might say, 'gosh, and it’s such a beautiful day.'"
Also of note, Pam ("Atlas Shrieks") Geller and her circle of Anti-Caliphate Crusaders have apparently decided the Media is concealing Mr. Brehm's secret Muslim identity, because one eyewitness claims he heard the shooter pause in the midst of shouting things like, "kill me!" and "I'm gonna die" to say "allahu akbar." Which, if you're trying to attract gunfire from an American police officer, sounds like an efficient way to go about it.
Spanning the globe...to bring you the constant variety of Wingnut! The subject of today's scouting report is Dr. Laurie Roth. Syndicated talk radio host. Martial arts action hero. And the next President of the United States!
Before we plunge into Laurie's plan for Undoing Obama (there is, as the headline notes, "Such much to undo"), let's verify her bona fides, shall we? Not that I doubt the good doctor's qualifications, for long experience of RenewAmerican has taught me one infallible rule: the longer the bio, the nuttier the pundit, and Dr. Roth's resume runs a very promising 200 words. But we'll just hit the highlights:
Dr. Laurie Roth — the "Annie Oakley" of the airwaves —
I assume this means she puts on displays of trick marksmanship for her listeners. "I'm about to shoot at a playing card that's over 50 yards away! I'm aiming...I'm squeezing the trigger... (BANG!) I just put a bullet right through the eye of the suicide king. Had he known I was taking a bead on him, he probably would have saved himself the trouble of sticking that sword in his head! Hahaha. We'll be back after this message from Goldline..."
is a nationally-syndicated radio talk-show host. She has hosted successful talk shows on radio stations from Boston to L.A. with no shortage of callers.
No shortage of gentleman callers, anyway... [Smooths her frock of yellowed voile, then glides across the room with a bouquet of jonquils].
Laurie has a Ph.D. in counseling and a black belt in Tae Kwon Do. If she can't reason with you, you had better duck before the roundhouse kick sends you flying!
Happily, if she puts you in the hospital with a broken jaw, she won't charge you for the sessions you miss.
She is a singer/songwriter with five CD albums to her credit, one track which landed her in Billboard's top 40 ranks and on the cover of Cash Box Magazine. She plays the piano, keyboard, and violin and has a voice that can penetrate your very soul.
Assuming the kicks and the gunfire don't do the trick. And what is Cash Box Magazine? Well, apparently "Cashbox (or Cash Box) magazine was a weekly publication devoted to the music and coin-operated machine industries in the USA which was published from July 1942 to November 16, 1996."
In 1989, Dr. Roth was voted "Most Likely to be Confused With Alannah Myles From a Distance and in Poor Lighting Conditions," while in 1992 she became the first "Miss Coin-Op Laundry" to hold a Doctorate in Counseling, a record that still stands today.
Laurie recently announced her candidacy for President of the United States as an independent. Her campaign website is www.laurieroth2012.com
If you hurry, you can still be the first person to review Dr. Laurie's book on Amazon (actually, you can probably take your time -- Jesus's General hasn't even gotten there yet). Anyway, on to her column...
Our very country and freedom have been at stake since the Obama regime took over, backed by progressive leftists transforming us into a Marxist Dictatorship 5 steps at a time.
Sounds like the way my sister and I played Monopoly after we lost the rule book.
Was this the "change" some of you signed up for?
Actually, I signed up for up for Volleyball and Skills Certificate in Business Software Applications. Have you got a drop slip handy...?
For starters, we have seen Obama shred the greatest healthcare system on earth
Well, it's winter -- he had to make a nest out of something...
insert hidden and draconian taxes
Because the more draconian a tax, the less likely you are to notice it. Most historians agree that Colonial Americans weren't even aware of the Stamp Act or the Tea Tax until four determined young people and a Great Dane rolled onto Boston Common in a psychedelic wagon dubbed the Deus ex Mystery Machina. And Parliament would've gotten away with it too, if it weren't for those meddling kids!
...force government-approved health insurance, controls, and fines on nearly all Americans, force salaries on doctors, and impose death panels on our seniors, and he is making us all pay for abortions and the care of illegal aliens.
Meanwhile, unbeknownst to Dr. Roth, Representative Michele Bachmann is standing just behind her, making that "ca-RAZY" rotating-finger gesture beside her head.
Those are just some of the cancers inserted all through Obamacare.
Obamacare is like that dry, tasteless "King Cake" you get at Mardi Gras, except instead of a tiny plastic baby doll, you dig around in it until you find a tumor.
We have watched Obama fulfill another threat to destroy one of America's historical backbones of energy: coal.
Now Americans are going out of their way to disappoint Santa Claus, just to fuel their barbecues.
Now he and his minions announce coal plant closures all over the country in the next 18 months, while hurling draconian regulations at power plants. As planned, thousands more will be out of work, utility rates will go even higher, and we will become more dependent on government and international energy sources.
That sounds awful! Still, I love it when a plan comes together.
We are now, eleven months before the November 2012 election-of-all-elections, surrounded by mountain-high lists of impeachable offenses all aimed at Obama. From illegal wars in Libya, to hiring members of the Muslim Brotherhood who work closely with him and Secretary of State Hillary Clinton, to suing and threatening his own governors for protecting the safety of their citizens.....on we go. I'm dizzy even trying to sort them all out.
That much is obvious, Doctor, although I might quibble with your grasp of cause and effect.
Then there is that teensy-weensy problem that causes most "Republicans," "sound-bite conservatives," "most media," and "the House and the Senate" to run for cover at Olympic speed. This is quite a dazzling feat to watch, since while running they are also hurling endless insults and slander against anyone or any group daring to point out Obama's ineligibility.
I actually have a bit more respect for these people now. While Obama just hurls draconian regulations, the rest of the team not only hurl endless insults (which sounds exhausting. Are there relief hurlers they can bring in from the bullpen if you tear a rotator cuff?), but they have to pitch slander while running the 100 meters in 9.58!
Then there was his arrogant, bravado moment showing America and the world his middle finger of a long-form birth certificate — forgery and total fraud. This was proven by several examiners and experts within hours of the big press revelation to be a total forgery. This was far from "tin helmet" and racism, but out and out crime and fraud.
A $25 donation to Dr. Roth's Presidential Campaign will buy a much needed thesaurus.
There was no one patriotic, honest, or brave enough to shine the light of truth on this constitutional and legal emergency, except the brave and gutsy voices in talk radio and online media journals such as the one you are reading now.
I have to admit, I'm a little curious about Dr. Roth's radio program now. I imagine it consists largely of random gunshots, and the sound of splintering wood as she breaks boards with her feet while screaming "Forgery!" and "Total fraud!"
To bring this never-ending saga to the present
The "seizing of America" plan moves boldly forward. We saw the Senate betray America and vote to permit our military to arrest and detain Americans without charge, indefinitely. Then we saw, per the revelation of a document revealed to the masses by Alex Jones and noted in my last article, the activation of FEMA camps all over the country. Why? I think we are starting to know why, folks.
I'm generally not in favor of Nanny State regulations, but frankly, I think these were exactly the kind of injuries the Tin Helmet Laws were designed to prevent.
UPDATE. Bill S. writes:
After reading the latest entry in WOC on wingnut Laurie Roth, I decided to see how much truth there was to the claims about her music background. It probably won't come as too much of a surprise that her albums are now out of print. Amazon offers used copies of her debut album -- which was, indeed reviewed in Billboard -- for as low as a penny. The vinyl's slightly pricier, but that's because it's rarer. In any case, the Billboard entry I found online says the album didn't chart.
As for the claim that "one track landed her in BILLBOARD'S Top 40 ranks", that's almost true.
She's never had a hit in the Top 40 of the Billboard Hot 100 -- or in the bottom 60 of it, either.
But she has placed a song on Billboard's Dance Music chart, back in 1993. It lasted for 5 weeks, and peaked at #41.
But this is the best part: it's a remake of the very racy hit by the Mary Jane Girls, "In My House". Unfortunately I can't find it on YouTube (surprising, considering you can find almost anything there), but I wonder why her bio fails to mention that her one and only almost-hit is a sex-laced song made famous by a girl group named for a slang term for marijuana?
And written, apparently, by Rick James. Here's Dr. Roth's rendition of "In My House" (Close Encounter Dub Mix):
Sadly, it's not a music video and she doesn't really sing much, but you do get to hear her panting quite a bit.
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