Monday, December 12, 2011

He Was Actually Saying "Yoo-Hoo!" to Admiral Ackbar

You may have heard about the shooting in Hollywood on December 9.  Or maybe you didn't -- it's not exactly an uncommon occurrence in the U.S.  In brief:
26-year-old Tyler Brehm...angrily stalked the Hollywood streets in front of dozens of witnesses, screaming that he wanted to die and firing seemingly at random at passing drivers, unloading close to 20 rounds from what appeared to be a .40 caliber handgun.

An off-duty officer working at a movie set and a detective confronted and shot him, police said.

A truck and another car were struck by bullets, leaving two men with minor injuries — one man with a graze wound and another with cuts from broken glass.
I mention it only because it happened quite close to where we live, and our friend Chris Vosburg was nearly caught up in the mayhem.  As he wrote at the time he took this photo, he was "out running a few errands and wondering what all the copters were about (found out later). Jeez, glad I was too lazy to swing by my bank" [located at the same intersection where the shooting occurred]. "As Marge Gunderson might say, 'gosh, and it’s such a beautiful day.'"

Also of note, Pam ("Atlas Shrieks") Geller and her circle of Anti-Caliphate Crusaders have apparently decided the Media is concealing Mr. Brehm's secret Muslim identity, because one eyewitness claims he heard the shooter pause in the midst of shouting things like, "kill me!" and "I'm gonna die" to say "allahu akbar."  Which, if you're trying to attract gunfire from an American police officer, sounds like an efficient way to go about it.

M Bouffant has more on the story: MuslimMuslin Cover-Up.


Anonymous said...

Ahhh Geller, every tragedy a cake upon which to spread the frosting of bigotty santorum.

Stacia said...

It's actually "Muslin Cover-Up," as in fabric. I say that not just to be That Guy, but because I thought it was hilarious.

Equally hilarious is this strange insistence amongst a certain breed of rightwingers to insist that the media isn't reporting something when it so very obviously IS. Sometimes, they even link to the media reporting it while saying it was never reported. Michelle Malkin used to be good at that; I don't pay 'tention to her anymore.

Stacia said...

And by hilarious I mean intentionally hilarious.

Scott said...

Hey, you're right. Damn, I hate missing a good typography joke. Fixed!

Anntichrist S. Coulter said...

Why wasn't PAM in that intersection?!?!?!

Hell, her medical-student's-worst-mistake-EVAR "face" could've been hiding around the corner whilst her SEVERELY gravitationally-challenged tits were in the midst of the gunfire!

M. Bouffant said...

For a mement I thought it was me shooting up the Kinkos where I once slaved, then I realized that was five+ yrs. ago.

"Missed it by that much."

M. Bouffant said...

Which, if you're trying to attract gunfire from an American police officer, sounds like an efficient way to go about it.

Excellent point, which I missed entirely. I blame something.

Chris Vosburg said...

Interestingly, I have one man to thank for missing out on all the exciting bullet dodging on Vine just south of Sunset:

Perry Mason.

As it happens, I wasn't working that day, and delayed my errands until after the 10AM episode of Perry Mason on ME-TV (thanks again M Bouffant!).

Were I not such a Perry fanboy, I would have headed out at 930A or so, and after pausing to snap the pic at Vine and Willoughby, would have gone, via Metro, on to the bank at Sunset and Vine.

On the Metro, we would have passed the shooter as he was shouting crazy at passersby at the McDonalds at DeLongpre, and it's doubtful that anyone even noticed him slapping a clip into a pistol. Hey, this is Hollywood, and street corner maniacs are common background noise, even when they're not wearing pants. Especially when they're not wearing pants; we avert our eyes out of courtesy.

Having finished up at the bank, I would have been standing at the southbound Metro stop to catch the the Metro back down Vine just in time to wonder, like many others, "hey, are they making a movie or something?" as Tyler Brehm swaggered up the middle of Vine banging away with his cannon at anything that needed shootin'.

So, saved by Perry Mason. [sigh] Is there anything he can't do?

Anntichrist S. Coulter said...

Well, I'm certainly glad that Perry saved you, Vosburg. Especially since you probably would've gotten some borderline-embarrassing flesh wound in your ass... or worse... and probably would not have enjoyed the grateful and relieved snickering from the peanut gallery.

Hey, at least a po-po or two shows UP at YOUR shootings --- lazy fucks of 5th District don't shift out of park until it's time to follow the meat-wagon out with the body bags. I think that 7 hours is a bit long to wait for a 911 response, don't you?

Nonetheless, I'm sincerely glad that this whackjob on the worst PCP trip EVER didn't get to pop a cap in your ass or anything else, and also glad that no one else was seriously wounded or worse. Yeah, I know, just another day in downtown L.A. You wear a badge. Your name is Friday.

Sorry, flashback from AntennaTV's daily dose of Jack Webb... and the "DRAGNET 1969" --- er, um... "dramatic re-enactment" of how LAPD prevented rioting following the 1968 assassination of Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. Yup, it was alllll Joe Friday, dood, teh po-po's were the ones who "kept the peace" in that neck of the woods. Suuuurrrre.

I dunno if they KNEW how racist so much of their dialogue sounded, but I got the vibe that Webb thought that he was being all sincere and sympathetic and sensitive to the loss of Dr. King, but hearing that one old balding cracker in the Emergency Control Room say, "Well, I've seen A LOT OF 'EM in my day, but I've NEVER seen a bunch of HOOLIGANS GOING TO CHURCH!"

A wheat penny to the first person who correctly guesses what the REAL word was, instead of "hooligans," and no, you can't use Bill Hicks in England as a cheat sheet. After all, ALLLL of those Dragnet episodes are TRUE STORIES, only the names have been changed to protect "the innocent." Too bad that they didn't give the real name of that balding old cracker with the shriveled old vienna sausage.

(Jealous as hell that you can still get Perry, they yanked our RetroTV and replaced it with "BOUNCE," which is made up almost entirely of televangelists/gospel concerts, mid-80s blacksploitation flicks trying to rip-off Spike Lee & Robert Townsend, and hourly episodes of "Soul Train." I could DEFINITELY live without the fucking jeebus shit if they'd let me have Perry, "EMERGENCY!" and "I SPY" back!!! Dammit. I miss "Kojak," too, but they yanked him last year, the pricks. Fuck, I can't remember EVERYTHING from 1973!!!)

Chris Vosburg said...

Annti writes: glad that no one else was seriously wounded or worse

Well, not quite. Music industry exec John Atterberry was shot in the face and died Monday afternoon.

As the LATimes reports, he was producing a Christian-themed movie, so you can expect to see a number of rightfloggers adding this to the pile of supposed Jesus-hatin' somehow driving the gunman. Yes, it doesn't make any sense, inasmuch as poor crazy Tyler could not have known who he was shooting at, but so help me, when has that ever stopped them?

Chris Vosburg said...

A wheat penny to the first person who correctly guesses what the REAL word was, instead of "hooligans,"

"Hoodlums". Just watched the ep here, to relive how stilted and unimaginative the Dragnet style was-- jeez, all interior shots, the camera never moves, the actors enter the shot from one side and stand in a line to deliver their dialogue, and then exit the other side. I used to nod or shake my head back at Joe or Bill whenever they delivered their patented nods and shakes.

The copTV style defined by Dragnet would continue through the seventies with such wooden crap as Adam-12 until finally destroyed by Hill Street Blues in 1981, founding the era of modern television.

Back to Dragnet and its depiction of the aftermath of the shooting of MLK: I didn't see this ep when it first aired, but I do remember the relative quiet in Los Angeles which followed the shooting. What the ep doesn't say is that we were only a coupla years out of the Watts riots, in which LAPD Chief Parker put himself in solid with the community he protected and served by calling them "monkeys in a zoo", and we were all a bit weary.

Two Chiefs later we got Daryl Gates, who so poisoned the LAPD with his bizarre "us v them" occupying army outlook, and this finally got us out in the streets again, in the aftermath of Rodney King's beating.

I remember whispering a single word at the TV screen when I first saw the footage of Rodney's clubbing:


Daryl and his style of policing got rode outta town on a rail, and the LAPD, to its credit, has since largely recovered from his influence.

Chris Vosburg said...

And a last add Jack Webb's Friday:

Ackroyd nailed it. He really does pronounce "Yes Sir" that way: "Yahssirr".

Anntichrist S. Coulter said...

Ugh. Ackroyd. Don't get me started. I've got ONE good memory of him, up against the past 16 years of sickening exploitation of the dead.

And I'm not asking for the "real word" as typed in the teleplay for that episode, I'm asking for what, in Jack Webb's words, was the ORIGINAL word used by the ACTUAL ASSHOLE in that "command post," and you can betcherass it wasn't "hoodlums."

And from what I've seen of "Dragnet" thus far, the Watts riots were most likely NEVER addressed, mentioned or portrayed. If they were, I really don't wanna think about it at this hour of the damned day.

I did hear about the one casualty (thus far) from that jacked-up kid yesterday or the day before, though they didn't mention the bibul-banger angle, they said that he was a "record producer" who'd worked with a coupla one-hit wonders whose names escape me at the moment. Probably too early to make smartassed remarks about him, though, so I'll save it for later, when teh bangers start flogging his corpse around as a "martyr" in the "fight to keep Gawd in Murka."

Kent whatsisface, Mr. Clean-Cut Do-Gooder on "Adam 12" always creeped me the fuck out. Marty Milner's sarcastic/bitter edge seemed a helluva lot more authentic.

Why Webb felt the need to fellate every motherfucker to ever put on a polyester uniform, I have no fucking idea, but we know what his opinion of us dirty fuckin' hippies was, don't we. I guess I should look up his half-assed Wiki entry (the "Bill Hicks" page is enough to wreck your fucking blood pressure, it's so incomplete and inaccurate!!!), to see if Webb ever served "the citizenry" in ANY capacity, military or pseudo-military/"peace officer." Nope, never saw the '50s movie, and don't think that I want to, even as research.

BTW, when I've had sleep, remind me to tell you about an expert on gangs, speaking to a convention of corrections/parole/probation officers... don't wanna blow the (real) punchline when I'm not funny in the least. I guess that it's sad that most of my favorite TV oldies DO involve the pork in some capacity or other, but "Route 66" is another one that I'd recently become addicted to, and it went with all the others on Retro. I guess ya gotta have cable to see anything besides "Hazel" that might involve a BROAD here or there...

Chris Vosburg said...

And I'm not asking for the "real word" as typed in the teleplay for that episode, I'm asking for what, in Jack Webb's words, was the ORIGINAL word used by the ACTUAL ASSHOLE in that "command post," and you can betcherass it wasn't "hoodlums."

So what was it? I'm pretty sure it wasn't "nigger," because everybody in LA agrees that niggers go to church regularly at their nigger churches.

Annti, take a deep breath, same as I did after reading your nasty innuendo. We're better than this.

Anntichrist S. Coulter said...

What innuendo? I thought that I said it flat-the-fuck-OUT, son.

Welp, you're FROM Daryl Gates Land, you might've lived around that freeway off-ramp where they beat the living fuck outta Rodney King and/or Reginald Denny (granted, not BY the po-po, but ya didn't see anybody in those helicopters hopping out to SAVE his ass, didja?!??!), you tell ME what a Goldwater republicunt Bircher motherfucking upper-rank LAPD suit would say about "hooligans" meeting in the Coliseum to honor Dr. King, whilst pretending that Watts never happened.

Face it, the first (and usually, most depressing) gut answer is usually the right one, if you are at all familiar with the motherfuckers in question. You watched that clip, you saw the snarl on that cracker's face, and then saw Jack Webb overcompensating (and with ONE WHOLE COLORED FELLA ACTUALLY *ON* THE FORCE AND *IN* THE COMMAND CENTER, TOO!!!) with his supposedly-"sympathetic" facial contortions and ripe-as-all-get-out bullshit blurts of peaceable manure. Gee, why would Jack Webb feel the need to OVER-REACH with the pseudo-"sensitivity," had some real-life porker not said the above and worse?

People suck.

If you get really lucky, you find a few people who tolerate your shit and who DON'T suck, at least not in bad ways, and ya hang onto those fuckers for all they're worth, 'cause the suck-ass motherfuckers will do everything that they can to suck every single teeny-tiny droplet of joy from your entire fucking life.

And half of them have government jobs. The other half have Reaganomics "privatized" so-called "social services" gigs at 5X the pay rate & overhead padding. Yeah, that's a personal reference, but if anyone would know about suck-ass gubmint jerks who don't deserve there jobs, wouldn't it be ME?

Anonymous said...

After the Rodney King incident, I read an article which traced the police attitudes to Chief Parker's history as Bircher, his having used the LAPD as a recruiting tool. The article stated that as of the early-mid '60s some considerable percentage of the force were JBS members.


Scott said...

Parker was before my time, but I well remember his successor, Ed Davis (I'm sure many people do, if only because of his single-card credit at the end of each post-67 Dragnet episode), and it was a huge relief when he retired, because how could anybody possibly be worse?

Then they hired Darryl Gates, sparking the most unexpected spasm of nostalgia ever. Hell, we used to say, at least Davis has been a crypto-fascist.

Anonymous said...

If I recall correctly, Gates was Parker's driver and acolyte, his were a continuation of the racism and far right wing policies that Parker introduced.


Chris Vosburg said...

You'd be hard put to find a police chief to the left of Parker-- it sort of goes with the job, I think, but Daryl Gates was another story entirely. He was not only a brutal fascist moron, he insisted that the entire force be brutal fascist morons.

Brutal fascist moronicity was taught at the academy under Daryl, I guess, because there's no other way to explain stuff like Daryl's "Operation Hammer" under which cops were directed to hassle unsuspecting citizens for the crime of simply standing there and not being white enough.

Serious. I'm sort of dark-featured, brown hair and eyes, and in the eighties, embarrassingly in retrospect, sported a bandito mustache and those glasses with the shaded gradation that Rockford Files heavies always wore.

So I'm waiting on a bus on Beverly, and a cruiser pulls up and two coppers get out and ask, so help me, "what are you doing here?"

I look at them, and look up at the sign identifying the bus stop, and then look back at them and ask "what the fuck does it look like I'm doing? I'm waiting for a fucking bus, you fucking moron."

Okay, I may have been drinking, but that bought me a sidewalk-kissin' and then, while I was face down, hilariously, they asked me for my green card.

What I'm saying is that this cop behavior came from the top dowm, and that's Daryl Gates.

It remained only for the citizenry of LA to arm itself-- with video cameras-- to expose the absolute horror the LAPD had become under him, and as I say, he was thankfully retired in the aftermath of the Rodney King beating.

To Rancho Santa Fe, a tony San Diego area exurb, from which he wrote smarmy letters to the LA Times whenever they pointed out the simple truth that he was a brutal fascist moron.

He died last year after a battle with bladder cancer, and I hope with all my heart that the battle was long and painful, and that he is now roasting on the hottest griddle in hell.

This isn't about cops per se: I happen to believe that the current LAPD is a model force, and get on well with them. Helpful, thrifty, brave, you name it, I like 'em, and I note that they are not into the gratuititous tasering that has characterized so much police work elsewhere.

Anntichrist S. Coulter said...

Like I said, they're your swine, honey, so you'd know 'em better than I could as an outsider.

BUT: The gang expert speaking to a convention of probation/parole/corrections officers, 'member that allusion?

Before an intermission, she asked for questions from the audience, and one person asked, "What do you consider to be the biggest and most-dangerous gang operating in the United States today?" (this was 3 or 4 years ago)

Without missing a beat, she didn't even drop a step or a breath: "L.A.P.D."

The whole place was on the floor with gut laughs, because they knew it, too.

And nope, that's not a joke, an actual anecdote that actually happened. All connections to the innocent have been deleted for all our safety.

If there were such a thing as "justice" in this universe, bladder cancer would've been the EASIEST part of Gates' slow, slow, slow, AGONIZING death. I'd have thrown-in recto-colon, sigmoid-colon cancer, throat/tongue/adenoid/lymph node cancer, and a flaming case of herpes. With sponge baths of Tabasco sauce.

I dunno if y'all could handle what I wish upon 99% of NOPD. Haven't seen 'em tase anybody yet, but then, it usually takes a coupla years for the truth, if it ever does, to surface around here. She says in the shadow of the Danziger Bridge... and fuck yes, I get a cold shiver every time that I have to drive over that sumbitch.

But not a one of THOSE rat-bastards will EVER see anything even remotely approximating "justice," thanks to the back-up of their brothers-in-blue-polyester, they were only busted in the CIVIL RIGHTS case. How any jury, no matter how crooked or illiterate, could consider those merciless killings "NOT murder" is way the fuck beyond MY comprehension. I hope that those jurors get ulcers.

This is one case where I wouldn't ask for the death penalty, BECAUSE THEY WOULD BE GETTING-OFF TOO EASY. But they should've gone to ANGOLA STATE PENN, dammit, not the Fed. Even though the warden is the most-corrupt corrections motherfucker ON EARTH (and yes, I'm including those "black box" prisons that Halliburton built all over Eastern Europe for "extraordinary rendition"), and he'd probably spend a lot of time on his knees with them, and NOT IN "PRAYER" (look up Burl Cain & his multi-million-dollar "chapel fund" for LA prisons, and see how many chapels he's actually BUILT... for starters), seeing as how he considers himself the head "law enforcement" motherfucker in the state, esp. since he's on EVERY SINGLE FINANCE COMMITTEE IN THE STATE CAPITOL (can you say, "redneck mafioso"? I knew that you could! He prolly thinks that HIS big fat ass is filling the evil vacuum created when Harry Lee died...).


Anntichrist S. Coulter said...



BUT, if the motherfuckers were put into GENERAL POPULATION, including a whooooole helluva lot of New Orleanians, justly and unjustly --- THEN those piglets might know what fear and pain are REALLY like.

So yeah, LAPD are a little more infamous, but if there is any solace to be gained from this discussion, at least you don't have to wait SEVEN FUCKING HOURS for NOPD to show up and do ABSOFUCKINGLUTELY NOTHING about the home invasion you'd called into 911.

RE: Danziger:

And Bibz? Ayy-fuckin'-men. Period.

Besides teeth (yup, they're still falling out, just like a meth whore!), a tune-up & oil change for the truck, new tires & a tailgate that opens, y'know what I *really* need/want for annti-xmas? A VIDEO CAMERA. Not just for the po-po, either. If y'all hadda deal with the racist cunts who call themselves "housing management" around this here plantation once known as Desire, you'd understand why I'm on blood pressure medicine since the day I moved in.

Just another beautiful day in Happy Town, kids... and no, no native of New Orleans or any SENTIENT part of Louisiana has EVER, and I mean fucking EVER referred to NOLA as "The Big Easy," at least not before that TEXAN Dennis Quaid laid that giant turd of a "movie." Sorry, can't help it. Been correcting erroneous myths about NOLA, LA, and the south in general for most of my life, 'cause the stereotypes get fucking OLD.

Oh, one other item for the Powerball Wish List: Suing HBO for fucking SLANDER.

Goodnight, enjoy your steaks, don't forget to tip your servers, we'll be playing at the Friendly Inn on Chef Menteur all weekend!