Wednesday, November 27, 2013

Turkey Day of the Living Dead!

If you're like me, and I know I am, you're still suffering separation anxiety from the annual Mystery Science Theater 3000 Turkey Day Marathon, even though that custom died out some time during the senescent phase of the 20th Century.  The good news is, everything old is new again, and just like anti-communist paranoia, Turkey Day has made an unexpected return.

Starting at noon Eastern, you can tune into, and watch a mini-marathon of six episodes, selected by fans and hosted by Joel Hodgson, who I imagine will be doing his impression of a baked Robert Osborne. Cool, huh?  I know what I'll be doing this Thanksgiving (since I don't cook and am not allowed in the kitchen on national holidays); assuming the live stream works, of course.  I'm willing to give the liberal elite a mulligan on, but they'd better not screw this up.

Speaking of cooking -- by which I mean food, since I'm pretty sure even people who make meth for a living take Thanksgiving off (narcotraficantes may be savage, hot-tempered, and blood-thirsty, but they're generally not quite the same caliber of remorseless asshole as you'll find in the upper management tiers of Wal-Mart) -- what are you guys doing for the holiday?

This about sums up our plans...

Mary's actually a gifted cook and really wanted to put on a traditional Thanksgiving feast, but when you've spent the last ten years of your life writing for a blog called World O' Crap, you really can't say No to a Sack O' Sauce in a Can O' Meat, now can you?

Happy Thanksgiving, guys.


Weird Dave said...


Weird Dave said...

Jill is making a trifle.
I am hopefully going to eat it with some friends down in the Old Pueblo.

acrannymint said...

Random fact: Here in Baltimore, sauerkraut is a tradition at Thanksgiving.

ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...

turkey turkey turkey turkey turkey turkey turkey turkey turkey turkey turkey turkey

Maybe I'll take a picture of it for the halibut.

Chris Vosburg said...

Streaming works terrific, and currently is displaying perennial favorite "The Truck Farmer" followed by, yes, you guessed it, "I Accuse My Parents", which is all about an essay-contest winning young man with a facility for delivering packages in his spare time and a taste for hamburgers.

Speaking of odd canned foods, and we were you know, while in Wisconsin at college in the seventies, I encountered Old El Paso CANNED TORTILLAS, for God's sake. No kidding, the can was like six inches in diameter and about an inch high. The tortillas were awful, as you might imagine, and I was thus moved to introduce actual Mexican food to the state.

Made my own tortillas and everything, and when I once had a big-ass pot of frijoles refritos simmering on the stove, the brit kid from downstairs looked in and asked, sounding like Patrick MacNee, "oh, are those tacos?"

Which he pronounced "tay-cos."

Chris Vosburg said...

Oh and here's five dollars, go out and celebrate.

See also Twilight Zone marathon on KTLA (ch5 LA).

Chris Vosburg said...

Since you mention Robert Osborne, Scott, I can't resist rubbing Robert's face in the embarrassing fact that before achieving a measure of respectability as the genial host of TCM, Osborne hit a particularly low point in his career shilling for one of those goofy "psychic hotline" scams.

Here's a sample (scroll to the 4:34 point).

Li'l Innocent said...

I'll bet my Thanksgiving teevee nostalgia pre-dates anybody else's here --- I refer to two traditions that may have been peculiar to the NYC metro viewing area, back in the days when broadcast telly was what there WAS, and local broadcast was pretty damn important in a kid's life, at least in our neck of the woods. The first tradition was the televised Macy's Thanksgiving Parade, live of course, on New York Channel 9, hosted by the locally well-loved "Officer" Joe Bolton. Mr. Bolton had an after-school TV program for young-to-middle-grade kids for years, in his persona as an avuncular neighborhood cop. This was long before the televising of the Macy's parade morphed into a giant shill-fest; it was seen as a children's event, not a marketing tool. /crabbygeezerrant
The second thing for which I nostalgize is the Thankgsgiving showing of the original "King Kong". Nuff said.

I wish all you Can O'Meat and Pouch O'Vegs folks out there a very happy Thanksgiving, though, even without giant apes.
The second

Li'l Innocent said...

(No, I haven't adopted "The second" as a new nom-du-tube. Not that it's a bad one.)

Anonymous said...

My husband found out about the MST3K marathon earlier today and spent an hour figuring out how to make it run on the big TV. Ready to watch it now that the family obligations are met.

grouchomarxist said...

Hey, this is great: I paused the stream when we left to eat turkey with the relatives, and it just picked right up where I paused it. And I was sad 'cause I thought I was going to have to miss the rest of "Cave Dwellers" (with its miles and Miles o'Keefe!)

Obviously, I was laboring under a major misconception about this "live" thingie.

And speaking of contracted prepositions, "Sack o' Sauce in a Can o' Meat" really is way too reminiscent of that old Firesign Theatre gag, "Cup o' Guts". It sounds more like EMT slang for the results of a particularly horrific traffic accident. Truly, only the 1950s could have spawned such a repulsive label for something nominally fit for human consumption.

Happy Turkey Day, all!

Doc Logan said...

I work in retail, and I got home just in time to see the last 40 minutes or so of "Mitchell". As if facing the zombie hordes surging forward to buy some piece of stupid plastic crap wasn't bad enough, I had to miss most of the first Turkey Day in ages.

Still, good to see Joel at the end, as well as our favorite wisecracking automatons.

Hope a good time was had by all of the World O' Crap community.

M. Bouffant said...

To Silver Lake for two frozen pizzas & a store-bought pumpkin pie slathered in Redi-Wip as we watched Mommie Dearest & Jailhouse Rock, followed by the dregs of the I Dream of Jeannie marathon.

All the while amusing ourselves (me & two other loons who've put up w/ me for 30 yrs.) w/ the sad fact that we're just as childish & juvenile as we were when we met long ago.

acrannymint said...

The Macy's day parade was a must see in the Jersey house I grew up in. Our movie tradition was The March of the Wooden Soldiers.

Dr.BDH said...

Missed the streaming, but popped in the DVD of "The Invasion of the Giant Spiders: episode, filmed just north of where we live (the spiders ran on VW chassies). Lots of local references (Menards, Packers). The kids loved it.

Then watched "The Girl with the Golden Boots." Deliciously horrible.

Both of these were Mike Nelson shows, which I know some purists reject. But my wife fell in love with me when I loaned her "Spiders" during a bad cold.

Speaking of Macy's T-Day Parade, back in the fifties my aunt and uncle took us by train into the city to watch the parade while Mom cooked turkey and fixings. This made us happy and prevented my aunt from contributing her baked yams with tiny marshmallows.

Dark Avenger said...

We had roast chicken and Farmer John ham, lumpia or eggroll, potato salad, cooked yam slices, kalamansi(Philippine lemon) juice from the tree in the back, and pumpkin pie from Smart and Final.

heydave said...

I worked at the food kitchen where I met my beloved, and then we went to the neighbors. Who now invite me to things because I am part of a lovely package deal and better fit for social circles.