The Top Ten Google Search Strings Bringing People to World O' Crap:
- mantis eating each other: Apparently, here at the Mouseketeer Clubhouse, it’s “Test Rule 34 Day."
- smurf vagina: I assume this is the female equivalent of "blue balls."
- constructivism is bullshit: I refuse to even engage with this bourgeois reactionary whose counter-revolutionary ideas threaten the very foundation of our non-autonomous art movement.
- film with hovering ugandians: That would be the prescient Danish dystopian art film It's All About Love, which argued -- in 2003! -- that battling Ebola with flight restrictions is pointless, because Africans are super buoyant and will just float over here under their own power.
- sweet smell in attic bats: This may be the worst impostor fragrance idea I've ever heard.
- hunky sexy pastor: I see Doug Giles has been doing a bit of auto-Googling again.
- mel gibson braveheart tits: Colloquially known as "McMoobs."
- mens beefy anus: I see the FDA is making even the title character of NBC's Hannibal disclose what he puts in his hotdogs.
- squinty dick: Um, I'll take "What a Pirate Nicknames His Genitals" for 200, Alex.
- the barbershop enemas: If you've never had a quartet of male nurses serenading you in close-harmony as they give you a pre-operative high-colonic, then you haven't begun to experience all the wonders Obamacare offers.
And now, please join me in wishing KWillow the happiest of birthdays and the manyest of returns.
Sexy Birthday Lizard! (Because that's a thoughtful, even contemplative face, and smart is sexy)
[Also, if you have a moment, drop by this thread and tell us which crappy horror film you'd like to see given the Better Living Through Bad Movies treatment for Halloween]