Josh Marshall from a dissatisfied customer:
Personally, fucking yourself sounds like a lot of work, especially if, like me, you're self-loathing, because then you have to imagine that you're someone else just to get off (and if you're looking into a mirror while doing it, you've got to take care that you don't call yourself by another name, because you'll ruin the moment, and might accidentally wind up summoning Candyman.) So I'd reverse the order of that To Do list: fuck yourself first -- get the hard part out of the way -- and then reward yourself by settling back with a nice steaming cup of pusscake. That's how Carol Lawrence did it in those old General Foods International Coffee commercials.
But then one of Marshall's other readers wondered what a "pusscake" is, which reminded me of the time, over at TBogg's place, when George Tierney of Greenville, South Carolina enlivened the American lexicon with his gift of the word "fuckchop."
So it seems like traditional insults are no longer sufficient for our conservative friends, who must resort to assembling complex new compound words in order to paint the room with rage. Now, I'm no expert on German grammar, so I'm not exactly sure how they go about daisy-chaining these neologisms, but based on the work of Mr. Krough and Mr. Tierney, the perfect rightwing pejorative appears to combine a reference to sex or sexual organs, with some kind of food (I assume "fuckchop" is a noun not verb, like "porkchop." In fact, those two words are probably synonymous).
The line wasn't moving so I continued to scroll, and saw that Mr. Krough claims to be a Marine, which reminded me how Lou Gossett, Jr.'s drill instructor in An Officer and a Gentleman addressed Richard Gere's Zack Mayo as "Mayo-nnaise," a gibe which seems premised on the same theme (granted, it's not sex+food, but it is condiment+jism).
Then I saw this follow-up tweet, and it all became clear to me...
While it's a regrettable practice that is increasingly proscribed, the fact remains that lower primates are still considered edible in some cultures, which leads me to conclude that what Mr. Krough and his confreres are offering us is not a tasting menu of random insults , but an entire table d'hôte banquet of abuse. Now again, I'm no caterer, but the way I see it, the fuck monkeys would be served first, as an appetizer (sort of like hush puppies); fuckchops would be the entree; followed by delicious pusscake for dessert.
By the way, many thanks to Thers of Whiskey Fire fame for this (extremely kind) post at Eschaton (and Hi to all the nice new people who dropped by. If you haven't had a chance, please consider picking up a copy of our book, Better Living Through Bad Movies. It contains more concentrated snark than you can find at Michelle Malkin's Twitchy, or Glenn Beck's The Blaze, or really any wingnut site that sounds like a slang term for a neurological disorder or an STD).
Also thanks to Thers for pointing out something which bears repeating: "SZ in particular doesn't get anywhere
near the credit she deserves. SZ invented left internet snark in a lot
of ways." I couldn't agree more, and have decided to start a new weekend feature, reposting some of her greatest hits from the early days of Wo'C. Let me know if you have any requests.